Secret One: Acknowledging Your Creative Self

So it's begun. A new dawn, a new journey. Scared at first, I wasn't sure if I should commit to any kind of project, especially one that I was going to be held accountable for publicly, I took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and took a leap of faith. In myself. I have to admit, I am still nervous about this whole process but not because I don't have faith in myself, more so, the lack of faith in my actions. I have started so many endeavors of self-improvement, proclaiming year after year that it was going to be "my year" only to fail, quit, give up somewhere along the process. I would devastate myself by giving up on the one person that needs my love the most...me. How could I expect to give my love freely if I was so easy to give up on myself?

Needless to say, I have felt compelled to begin a year of healing. I won't be giving up this time. I need to be my biggest fan. I need to love myself not for what I look like to the outward eyes that view me but for the way I shine inside. And instead of sabotaging myself yet again, I am going to embrace all of me and nurture my creative soul. I have muted my muse for far too long. It is time I celebrate the beauty that she is and yes, she is extraordinarily beautiful.

When I came across Jamie's posts while she was in the midst of "Soul Coaching," there was a flicker of light being babied inside of me. I felt the flames of change and I knew it was time to surrender, to take a hold of my life again. So she announced that she would lead The Next Chapter: 12 Steps of Highly Creative Women, I knew I had to join. I knew I was going to be living my life motto of "Inspire & Be Inspired"...living an inspired life. Wow! How empowering is that?

There was a sentence in the book that reached out and grabbed me and said LISTEN,

"We continue to be stifled by a host of factors that cause us to sensor our inner voices and follow someone else's dream."

Ahhh! So true. I have allowed myself to be punished by my past; thinking all the time that I am unworthy and feeling increasingly small in a world of people that were not like me. I was/am different. Instead of embracing the unique qualities that I possess, I continued to berate myself for being so on the outside. Well it is time to stop sitting on the sidelines of life. I will not allow myself to feel or be insignificant. I will break through and let my creative muse be free to create magic without abandon, to revel in the beauty within while outwardly expressing what my soul feels. I will listen to my artistic voice and become my authentic self, which is a burst of beautiful ordinary. I will allow compassion and passion to lead me to paint my story in the medium in which my authentic self shines.

My creative self has not yet reached its potential. I am going to live out loud, dare to let go of any inhibitions and fill a void with grace. I'm ready to engage in life, creatively, spiritually and blissfully. Giving up on me is not an option. I will heal. I will soar. I will bleed inspiration. I will encourage my heart's desires to be met. I will breathe in life as I see it and feel it. I want to believe in myself, my photography, my art, my writing and let each of those gifts be opened with the intentions of accepting who I am and what I create to be good enough. I will create a retreat that feeds my soul within my place of comfort and safety, my home. I will cultivate my life and trust my creative muse as she guides me on this new journey of creating the life that fills my soul with joy. I will find my BLISS. I will BE PRESENT. I will BE BLESSED. I will just BE.

In closing, I would like to leave you with this quote that touched me as I read it in the book:

In the sacred traditions, the first thing you do in the morning is ask for blessings from the four elements: earth, air, fire and water. Because all of the work that you are going to do that day will change the universe. ~Laura Esquivel